How to Deal With Survivor's Guilt
By Donald Jacobson and Shelley Safian
With wave upon wave of layoffs hitting the workforce each week, these are brutal times on the employment front. If your own operation has suffered some casualties, you may be dealing with an outbreak of survivor's guilt among your remaining staffers. As irrational as it may be, it's not uncommon for those left behind to feel that they're somehow to blame for keeping their jobs when friends and coworkers have lost theirs.
It's something you should take seriously. It can be difficult to be one of the survivors. In addition to the guilt they may be feeling, there's a good chance they're worried about losing their own jobs. There's also the stress of added work. With fewer people around, they're probably shouldering a bigger workload, which can lead to resentment.
Making things harder, they might even be angry with you. It doesn't matter that you were forced to hand out pink slips by the executive board. It doesn't matter that you fought hard to keep the casualties to just five people instead of the 10 originally proposed by the director.
Whatever the case, your job is to keep survivor's guilt from dragging down morale and productivity—and doing so at a time when you yourself may be suffering from the same affliction. What can you do for your people and yourself? Here are some ideas.
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Take action. One way to feel better about yourself is to give to someone else. We aren't talking about charity donations here. This isn't about money or used clothing—your former coworkers wouldn't accept it anyway. Instead, we're talking about volunteering your time and energy to outreach programs aimed at helping them find another job.
How do you do that? One way would be to work with the local chapters of WERC, CSCMP, and APICS to organize a job fair. Another would be to contact a local university or business organization (like the Chamber of Commerce) to set up a free seminar about job hunting or resume writing. Perhaps you could even put together a series, with presentations on cutting your home budget, ways to save, and retraining opportunities.
Similarly, you could contact some of your clients to see if any of them are hiring people with the same skills as those you had to lay off. You might be able to negotiate a win-win for everyone involved.
- Stand strong. It's normal to feel guilty about keeping your job while people all around you were let go, but it's important to remember that you didn't do anything wrong. Continue to do the best job you can and try to maintain an upbeat attitude. Letting anger and resentment toward your company fester won't accomplish anything; in fact, it will only add to your stress. Understand that business is business (for the most part). Work as hard as you can to help keep the customers happy so when the economy turns around, you'll still have a job and can perhaps hire your people back.
- Get counseling. If the guilt feelings become overwhelming, don't hesitate to get some professional help from a therapist. There are community resources that you can access for free. It is not a sign of weakness to seek assistance. If you broke your leg, you wouldn't hesitate to use crutches until it healed. Psychotherapy provides that same support for an injury that can be equally debilitating.
You will get through this. We know this because many of us have lived through tough times, and we got through them. You can do it! As Gregory Peck said, "Tough times don't last ... Tough people do!"
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